Overheard in the queue at Ali’s Cave, North Junction Street
(Lady with shopping trolley bag approaches assistant behind the counter)
Do you no hae any tatties hen?
– Naw, we dinnae sell tatties here.
Aye, but tatties, ye must hae tatties. Any’an has tatties.
– Naw, electric, dog fod, batteries, toys, aw that stuff. Nae tatties.
Aw. Well then, go an hae a look in the back, eh, U’ve come aw this way an a taxi’s waiting ootside. U’ve got aw the messages eh.
– See I canne leave the shop flaer. Here, how’s aboot some crisps, that do ye?
Whit’s that go tae do wi tatties like?
(Both sigh. Shop assistant smiles and serves next customer.)